Un/cultured 05

Past James: I think I’m possessed by the Spirit of Christmas Past because I don’t have a Linkedin.

Present Mike: I like to live in the now. Hence, Christmas Present.

Future AI Robot Overlord Justin: I am the Christmas Future of human thought, and I made a 218-slide deck about it.

Present Mike: As always, our clients will appreciate the sheer number of words.

Past James: Since we’re locked in this conference room, can I tell you guys what I’ve been thinking about? (I’m not waiting for your answer.) It’s the Power Loom Riots of 1826, and how they relate to emerging technology! 

Future AI Robot Overlord Justin: …dare we ask why? 

Past James: I thought you guys would never dare ask why! See, in jolly old England, hand loom weavers were facing a problem – power looms were much more efficient and required less skill to operate. This, of course, was a threat to their livelihoods. But our brave weavers didn’t roll over – oh no. In fact, this all sparked a huge labor uprising, which led to riots that lasted for three whole days.

Present Mike: Amazing! Did they win? 

Past James: Nope! Not even a little bit. Today, almost all textiles around the world are made on some sort of powered weaving machine. 

Future AI Robot Overlord Justin: I feel like I’m about to be attacked to make a broader point about AI.

Past James; Actually, this got me thinking: with some technologies, it would be better for everyone to embrace the inevitable – but also to plan for it properly so that we take care of our fellow humans. We’ll get more out of efforts to leverage the power of AI while making sure workers are treated equitably overall, rather than trying to avoid the use of genuinely useful technologies that are only going to be more and more widespread.

Future AI Robot Overlord Justin: Huh. That was much less attacky than I predicted.

Past James: Can’t read my mind yet, baby.

Present Mike: Can it be my turn now?

Past James: Sure! What have you been thinking about, as we continue to be locked in this conference room, possessed by spirits?

Present Mike: I thought you’d never ask! Picture this: a handheld device … you can play games on.

Future AI Robot Overlord Justin: One, I have several of those, and two, how does this relate to AI?

Present Mike: It’s not your turn yet. Consider this: from Game Gear to the Nintendo DS to the Steam Deck, the real driver of mobile gaming development and pricing has always been a demand for the highest quality experiences that the hardware can deliver – games with a world, games that a person can really love.

Past James: Don’t we have that now?

Present Mike: Sure, but many AAA games only make it to your Steam Deck and never arrive on your phone at all. Which is weird, because our smartphones have better hardware than ever! I think they haven't totally caught up partly because people still expect mobile games to be $4.99 or free. And hey, I get that making AAA games on mobile costs a lotta clams, but I would gladly shell out some extra cash to live in a world where I can romance a drow paladin in Baldur's Gate 3 from the comfort of my smartphone! Thankfully, Apple and Netflix are starting to put out all-timers like Resident Evil 4 on their mobile platforms at a solid price point that rewards studios and publishers. I think we need more of that in today’s world.

Future AI Robot Overlord Justin: Spoiler alert, that’s coming … in the future.

Past James: Fine, so what’s YOUR thing? And will it put me out of a job?

Future AI Robot Overlord Justin: I thought you’d never ask! I was thinking about entertainment. The biggest entertainment franchises of today – they’re just not hitting like they used to. And the problem is just getting worse. How do we fix it? Consider this: Games! Games are the answer to franchise fatigue. 

Past James: Please stop asking me to consider things.

Future AI Robot Overlord Justin: But you should! Fast & Furious, Indiana Jones, Marvel – all these franchises underperformed this year. Meanwhile, video game-based productions are finally being taken seriously, and they’re getting good. As a result, almost every major franchise has one in the works. Fallout! Borderlands! God of War! Horizon! Remember how everyone was talking about Disney buying EA (dumb idea) to make games? Why buy a licensee when you can go straight to the licensors and have the next wave of billion-dollar content?

At this point, our CCO Patrick knocks on the thick glass wall of the conference room with his oven mitt.

Patrick: Hey. Can you guys hear me? Are you still haunted?

Present Mike: For the moment, man.

Patrick: Okay, well … we’re almost done cooking out here, soooo … what if you just get your last lessons about past, present, and future out of your systems? Past James?

Past James: I thought you’d never ask! The Console Wars are back, baby! But it’s so much worse than it was in the bygone days of friendly competition, like Nintendo vs. Sega, or 2000’s era Playstation vs. Xbox.

Between press coverage and social media dunking, things are dirtier, more political, nastier, and increasingly personal. Consider the throwback feud between Xbox and Sony fanboys. It’s evolved into an internet full of angry discourse – people waiting to pounce on every legal development – and it’s devaluing the amazing work of developers/creators on both sides.

Patrick: Gross. I miss “Sega does what Nintendon’t.” Present Mike, are there reasons we can be optimistic about fandom right now?

Present Mike: I think so. 2023 really saw fandoms wield their power in positive ways. Sure, a few years ago BTS used their clout to troll Trump rallies, but this year it was the fandoms themselves that were front and center. Beyoncé and Taylor Swift put on the most successful tours ever, and these were more than shows, they were huge gatherings of community – safe, celebratory spaces for their fandoms that ended up dominating social media, and eventually, even taking over movie theaters. But fandoms didn’t just come together to celebrate – the power of community actually helped fuel the successful strikes across the entertainment industry, too. Every year, fan communities get bigger and stronger.

Patrick: Any last visions from the future? Maybe something creative?

Future AI Robot Overlord Justin: Have you noticed that out-of-home activations don’t even have to be real anymore? Pseudo-virtual-OOH is gaining tons of traction – like giant Barbies, TRUFF Hot Sauce, Maybelline eyelashes on trains, and many, many others. We're going to see much more of that in 2024. Sure, it can be a little weird right now for people to navigate what’s real and what isn’t, but that’s actually part of the fun. It’s also incredibly cool for creative and marketing people, who often have really clever ideas but can’t put them into the world because of limited or inflexible media or install spend. Spheres ain’t cheap.

James: Wait a sec… It’s working! The curse is lifting. 

Mike: Hey, he’s right! I feel different. 

Patrick: And your names changed back. Looks like you guys are finally … un/possessed.

Mike: I see what you did there, but kinda wish I didn’t.

Future AI Robot Overlord Justin: Wait, why am I still Future AI Robot Overlord me?

James: You’re the head of our Strategy team. I think we all knew this transformation was inevitable.

Patrick: You guys ready to come out and try this Christmas goose? It’s spectacular.

Mike: We thought you’d never ask!

And with that, the holidays are officially Un/wrapped. Patrick lets our three experts out of the conference room and leads them to a delightful holiday feast. (Bless us, every one.) Happy holidays, from all of your friends at Unobtainium! See you in the New Year!